Tears of confession
by kurenohikari
Summary: Ichigo, Renji, Hiromi, Yumichica and Hanataurou are mistreated by their loved ones, but they don't let that get to them. They get back on their feet. They decide to leave so they can get strongger and do the best thing they know to do... protect others.What will happen when Grimmjow, Byakuya, Toushirou, Ikkaku and Kenpachi finally find out what they had lost? Will they be too late?
1. Act I: Ichigo

It's been two years since the Winter war and the defeat of Aizen, a lot of things happened since that day. Firstly I almost lost my powers, but Shiro (Ichigo's inner Hollow) saved me. He unified himself with me in some way, he did it to recharge my spiritual powers. No one knew how he did that, which really bothered Mayuri and Kisuke. That didn't mean that I stopped being a vizard, completely the opposite. When Shiro disappeared and unified himself with me, I became even more a vizard than my fellow vizard mates. My hollow side and my shinigami one finally were in peace and complete balance... but one thing that I'll never admit out loud is that I miss Shiro. That little shit drove me crazy and wanted to see me dead, but he had always been there to save my sorry ass when I needed him.

Talking about the vizards. Surprisingly when the old man Yamamoto offered them to go back to soul society, they refused saying that they'd rather stay here in Karakura with me. Stating that it was their duty protect and defend our territory from other packs. It seems like hollow have packs, so vizards have them too.

The surviving Arrancar are no problem either. When Aizen was defeated Grimmjow took over the throne of Las Noches as its new king. The bastard of Aizen used the powers of his sword to make the ex-Sexta think that he was weaker than him, but in reality Grimmjow was the strongest of all the Spadas and shinigami traitors. The true ruler of Las Noches and the Hueco world.

As so he made sure that all the Arrancar left Karakura alone, also there was a big diminution in the hollow activity since he took over. In a way I was thankful for that, my studies got better... a lot better. When I graduated I was the third of my class, just behind Uryu and Inue. However, I knew that Grimmjow only did that so I would be on my best capacity to fight him.

Not that I don't like a good fight, but fighting Grimmjow always lead to the same thing... rough sex against the nearest surface. I don't know how it started. One moment we were clashing swords and throwing punches, the next second he had me pinned against a wall kissing the life out of me.

I don't know when I've started noticing how handsome his features were, or how hot his macho alpha attitude was. But what I know is that I had fallen head over heels for Grimmjow and that there was no turning back.

At the moment I was sulking on the kitchen table of my house. I sighed as I looked around the mess of the room. Previously there had been a celebration, where all my friends (minus the ones from Sereit), Kisuke, Yoruichi, Tessai, Jinta, Ururu, the vizards, my little sisters and dad assisted. After all I had been accepted into the Tokyo medicine school, and I was to start there next fall.

No matter how much I tried for the rest that worked so hard to make me this small party, I couldn't manage to feel happy at all. My head was full of so many conflicted thoughts that it made it almost impossible to feel anything but frustration and sadness.

Sighing again, I looked up from my beer to the picture of my mother and thought to myself: _I can't believe I will do this, not after how much I shouted at my father for being so stupid to do it himself but... mom, help me. I don't know what to do. Which is the right way to calm my aching heart?_

"Berry!"

 _Talking about Rome_. I commented, snorting, in my head before turning around to face Grimmjow, and hissed at him angrily.

"Shut it! My family is asleep and I don't want them to wake up".

"What happened here" he demanded to know, he never asks because he is too good for that "It looks like a party" he commented, cornering me against the table with his hands on the back of my chair, each one on a side of my head. The fucker even had the nerve to smirked when I blushed because he leaned down, so he would be at my eye level, making our lips be only millimeters away "You had fun and didn't invite me. Ch, ch, it's not a right move to anger the King of Hueco world. No one told you that before".

"Fuck you!" I cursed under my breath, but because we were so close he was able to hear me which, made him chuckle.

"I would love to" he purred seductively before stealing a sensual and slow kiss from me, a kiss that left me with a ragged breathing "But first..." the bastard teased me and flashed me his idiotic cocky smirk "... what was the party for?".

"To celebrate my acceptance to the college of medicine from Tokyo" I replied, licking my lips unconsciously.

I enjoyed the way his eyes followed my tongue, as if he was invoke to do so. There was something about giving up control and becoming someone's center of attention. I gave up so much for the shinigami and that only got me to be their side kick to call whenever they had a problem and left when I had finished my 'duty', of course not counting my friends there. But with Grimmjow I didn't have to act strong or fight for attention, he gave it to me immediately. I even think that he gets off on him having the upper hand.

However, like with the shinigami when I had completed my use I was discarded away like a toy without any use. And that made me feel... well, used but in a complete different sense than with the Gotei 13.

Suddenly I was brought back from my thoughts when he attacked my lips again, but this time it was roughed and more demanding than before. He began caressing my thighs, instinctively I opened my legs for him to be more comfortable, my body already in tune with his after so many nights of passion shared between both of us.

"That's it, good boy. Opening your legs for me without any protest, like a bitch in heat" he murmured huskily in my ear before nipping my earlobe.

I don't know if it was what he said in that moment, or the accumulation of so much frustration and hurt, or that I finally saw that I was a toy for him, but something broke inside of me at that moment. Something that made me push him away, use my Substitute Shinigami badge to turn into my shinigami form and ran away from him, heading to the door towards the Gotei 13. Of course, Grimmjow followed me and caught me just only a few meters away from my objective.

"What the hell?!" he cursed, glaring at me "What is wrong with you!".

"I love you, son if a bitch! That is what is wrong with me!" I screamed at him.

Tears of anger and frustration burning behind my eyelids, but not letting the fall. I couldn't let him see me more vulnerable. Grimmjow let go of his grip on me to look at me as if I had grown a second head.

"What did you say" he said, now with a more leveled tone of voice.

"I love you, Grimmjow. But I am only a game for you, a toy to use whenever you are bored. I can't keep on doing this not anymore" I told him, hating how pleading I sounded.

"You want this to finish" he clarified with a deep scowl.

I just chuckled humorless and took advantage of this slip up of his, I flashed step to the enter of the door and waited for it to close. But before that I told him sincerely:

"You can't finish something that never started" I let a single lone tear trail my cheek and my eyes drown in the beauty of Grimmjow for the last time, before watching the doors close separating me from him.

When I got to Rukongai I wandered for a while before noticing Renji's raitsu and following it towards a very homey and Japanese style cafe. But what surprised me the most is who I found in there, they were...


	2. Act I: Renji

_Really?!_ I thought angrily as I watched Kuchiki taichou completely ignore me.

The whole sixth division was celebrating and congratulating me, but not even that seemed to matter for my cold hearted taichou... well, ex-taichou.

 _But what else could I have expected?_ I asked myself, all anger gone and the only thing left was frustration _Not even me becoming the captain of the fifth division would have caught his attention. I am just a silly and pathetic monkey that is still foolishly trying to reach towards the moon. And maybe I am... he is a high mighty noble and I am a street rat_.

I sighed again, flashed my ex-shinigami mates a forced grateful smile and left with the excuse of being tired after my captain test. Luckily they didn't notice and made me promise them to not act as a stranger just because from now on we were going to be in different divisions. Of course, I agreed. Since knowing that I was elected to make the test I vowed to not act like some ex-captains, just because I will be one doesn't mean that I will treat the rest like inferiors.

"Why are you leaving early" demanded to know Kuchiki taichou.

"Will it kill you to add a interrogation sign at the end of a question?" it left my lips before I could stop it.

But then remembered that I didn't need to fear him, he wasn't my taichou anymore. This thought brought me equal relief as sadness. I turned around in time to see surprise flashing in his eyes before his expressionless facade returned.

"I am waiting" was the only answer I got from Kuchiki taichou.

"I do as well" I replied, watching a bit gleefully how shock flashed by his face again. I liked to know that at least I had some effect on him "I have been waiting for some kind of respect or at least notice of my worth from you for _years_. I really don't know when my hate for you, for taking Rukia the girl I love like a sister, away from me changed to admiration...".

"She is my sister" he cut me off with a glare and icy tone.

"And what a great job you do!" I snapped at him, my rage returning and stunning my ex-taichou to silence "Whenever you have to choose between your pride and her, guess what wins?" I asked sarcastically "Your pride!" I yelled at him "That is not how a brother should act! You look down at the rest in disgust and superiority. No one matter more than yourself and your pride!".

"Abara..." he began to talk, as much rage and surprise clear in his tone, but I cut him off.

"You don't notice the dedication and effort that other people do for you. I worked hard every day so you could be proud of a what a dedicated fukotaichou you had, even when I was sick I tried as if it didn't matter. I followed you when you wanted to execute Rukia, I fucking forgave you when you tried to kill me! When the zampaktous were driven crazy by their instincts and everyone thought you were a traitor I stood firmly believing that they were mistaken, no matter what were your actions".

I noticed that tears were falling from my eyes but I didn't care, I finally have the opportunity to speak my mind and I was going to take as much advantage as I could.

"I stood behind you and followed you every step of your way, since I became your fukotaichou. I gave you my total loyalty and my whole dedication, all because I looked up at you. Not because I was the monkey that tried to reach the moon, but because I was the snake that admired it. I admired how bright you shone, how graceful you were, how strong you were, how you could be the head of your clan and the taichou of the sixth division at the same time... but it never mattered to you. A noble would never care for a street rat, would they?" I flashed him a sad and defeated smile.

It surprised me to see that his expressionless facade wasn't in his face anymore. That I was able to see such a raw anguish in his eyes, an anguish that was so featureless of taichou Kuchiki. However, I didn't care. I didn't care that I think he finally began noticing me, because it was already too late... I had given up on my ex-taichou.

"The worst is that I had fallen in love with you" his eyes widened, only a fraction but it was a lot on the usual expressionless taichou "But it doesn't matter anymore" I turned around to leave, but I was stopped by a hand on my arm "Kuchiki taichou?" I asked him surprised.

What stunned me wasn't the sudden action of my ex-taichou, I was expecting it. After the way I behaved I would have been shocked if he didn't punch me for my bad behavior. However, the strike never came. He just stared at me with a thoughtful look, it was unreadable and gave me the sense that he was calculating me.

"I see you don't feel the same was anymore" he said after a while of silence.

"It has nothing about not feeling the same" I said with a humorless laugh "It has to do with having given up and being tired".

"The fukotaichou I know would have never given up" he told me, now glaring.

I ignored the recognition of my abilities he had just given me. Like I said before, it was already too late.

"The fulotaichou you know is tired of having his heart tore apart from his chest and trample on it" I replied, freeing myself from his grip.

I flashed step away from taichou Kuchiki and used my best effort to suppress my raitsu, even if I wasn't the best on it.

I wandered for a while through Rukongai until I caught Famille*, my favorite restaurant.

 _I must have unconsciously walked towards here._ I thought. _Better. I am sure that Hiromi will listen to me and give me good advice, she always does_.

"Renji?!" she exclaimed surprised but then smiled brightly. However, I could notice that it was forced "What are you doing here? I thought that you would be celebrating with the sixth division because of your promotion".

"I'll tell you my story later, you tell me yours first" I told her after sitting down.

"I don't know what you mean" her smile flattered for a second, but I noticed it.

"Don't treat me as an idiot, Hiromi. Not you" I replied with a strained tone of voice, remembering my Kuchiki taichou "I might not be as intelligent or good with words as you, but I have always been there for my friends".

"Renji... I am so sorry! I didn't mean to make you feel like that" she launched at me hugging the life out of me.

 _Damn it!_ I cursed in my head. _Sometimes I forget how strong she is. I really have to convince her to join the shinigami_.

"I just had a very bad day" she confessed in a murmur, but I was able to hear her.

"Tell me then" I told her softly. I wrapped my arms around her, hugging her closer to me "It's time for you to lean on other and let them be the ones giving advice. Nobody can be strong for ever... we break otherwise".

I felt a pang of hurt in my chest at my own words, recalling my own issues with my ex-taichou.

"Well..." her voice brought me back from my blue thoughts "It all started when..."

*Famille (French) = Family (English).


	3. Act I: Hiromi

**Last Chapter:**

"I just had a very bad day" she confessed in a murmur, but I was able to hear her.

"Tell me then" I told her softly. I wrapped my arms around her, hugging her closer to me "It's time for you to lean on other and let them be the ones giving advice. Nobody can be strong for ever... we break otherwise".

I felt a pang of hurt in my chest at my own words, recalling my own issues with my ex-taichou.

"Well..." her voice brought me back from my blue thoughts "It all started when..."

 **Chapter 3:**

"It all started three years ago, after the first fight against Aizen. I normally have a lot of costumers that are Shinigami, being honest the great majority of my costumers are from the Gotei 1, specially the third, ninth, tenth and sixth division. However, one particular dawn a new face I've never seen entered my restaurant/café/bar/confectionery or whatever this place is. I quickly recognized the white trench coat of a taichou and the symbol of the tenth division. Normally, only Shunsiu-taichou and Jūshirō-taichou come here, and now you. This place is more resorted by fukotaichous, seaten Shinigami and normal shinigamis, not by taichous. So, as you'll imagine I got curious and decided to know what made him come here. I was expecting something like Rangiku-fukotaichou recommended my place or something like that" I chuckled sadly at my naivety and frowned at the true reason "However, it ended up being a complete different story. That morning had been the first day of Hinamori-fukotaichou's hospitalization... he had just left the fourth division and wanted some peace and quiet from everything and everyone. So, he had just entered the first place he had seen open".

"I still don't get what does all this has to do with you feeling blue?" interrupted me Renji with a confused frown. I smiled a bit at him, I had always adored how blunt and utterly cute he is when he doesn't understand something. But right now I just wanted to smash my tray on his head "After all, it happened three years ago?!".

"If you would just shut up and let me speak, you'll see where I am wanting to get to!" I snapped at him, ignoring his expression of pure shock at my so un-Hiromi way of acting "Being my kind self I offered him an ear to hear him out in his times of need, just like I do for everyone else. At first he was hesitant to share about his problems... well, he more likely refused as soon as I offered my help. But you know me".

"You didn't stop at nothing, you saw a soul in need and your mother instincts reacted" Renji cut me off, ignoring my yell of 'They are not mother instincts!' and continued speaking "You shared some of your past, surely of the family you miss in earth and how you love your job. He fell into your trap and began telling you about his problems, and later thanked you for your excellent advices".

"Yes, but the curious thing is that he came back. Every single day at the same time, when there is no one awake but a few people from the village, he comes to here and talks to me. He told me about trivial things as what are his favourite things, critics my food and complains about his division, especially Rangiku. But he also told me about important things, such as his grandmother, Hinamori-fukotaichou and his childhood. I in return for his trust, I told him about my favourite things, new recipes that I want to try on and complain about drunk Shinigami that don't know when they have to leave. I recall one time that he offered me to kick their asses for m, so they'll learn their place" I chuckled at the memory "Of course, I told him that it wasn't necessary. That I knew how to defend myself and if I needed help I could always depend on my best friend, Renji. He only left me alone when I assured him that I meant the fukotaichou of the sixth division and not a man from the village, who curiously had the same name".

"He is quite overprotective for the ones he love, even if he doesn't like to admit it everyone knows it" commented Renji eyes sparkling with amusement, surely imagining Toshiro. I sighed in relief at that, he was so sad that it broke my heart. He must have finally confessed his love for Kuchiki-taichou and had gotten his heart broken.

"I also... I also told him about my past..." I confessed softly, playing with my apron nervously.

"By your past you mean... you can't mean that?!" exclaimed Renji shell shocked.

"Yes, I meant that. I told him about my life when I was alive, my first years here, how I met you and... how I died when I was still human and alive".

"You trusted him that much?!" he asked me, very surprised by my confession.

"I dated the guy, of course I trusted him with that!" I exclaimed back at him "The base for a healthy and good relationship is communication and trust".

"Dated?" he questioned with a raised eyebrow "Hiromi what happened?".

"I... I'm getting there" was my weak and shy response "As I was telling you, we talked, we got to know each other, we teased each other, we laughed together... we became friends and confidents for each other. We took our friendship outside 'Famille' and began to schedule meetings in different places. In simple words, I fell in love with him Renji. I knew since the beginning that he loved... loves Hinamori-fukotaichou. But I still blinded myself with my feelings and asked him out when the war against Aizen was over. Otherwise Syrene would have been very ashamed of me. We never back out from a challenge or let fear stop us from doing something. As pathetic as it sounds I convinced myself that as long as he didn't cheat on me with her everything would be alright" I began to sob a bit, and let him big arms surround me in the safety of his embrace "And it was, everything was perfect between us... if we ignore the fact that whenever Hinamori-fukotaichou wanted a damn thing or needed Toshiro he would dump me without a second thought or explanation. The worst is that he never apologized".

"How did you stand two years of that?!" he demanded to know angrily.

"How could you stand so many years under the cruel treatment of Kuchiki-taichou?" I retorted, shutting him up "The same way as you" I answered his question, even if I was angry at him "Because I love him. But as I told you, in a relationship is necessary trust and communication. I confessed how left out I felt whenever he would dump me for Hinamori-fukotaichou and how hurt I felt that he never apologized for that. Do you know what he said?" I chuckled sadly at how pathetic I sounded, and continued talking when he shook his head as an answer "He said that I should stop being a jealous and insecure brat, that he only does what he does because his best friend needed him. That he never complained when I dump him to help you out or anyone else. Am I really that bad? I always apologize to him for doing that, and make him sweets as a peace offering. However, he never does anything. I know that that's because he doesn't believe he is wrong... because for him Hinamori-fukotaichou will always come before me and is the one he loves" I roughly tried to whip the tears away with my fists, trying to stop myself from crying again "Do you know that he completely forgot our two year anniversary? I thought that it was because he was busy with his captain's duties, I waited for him the whole day and the following one I still held hope that he would do something special. At the end, he didn't even remember and had spent the whole day shopping with Hinamori-fukotaichou! He hates shopping! I was never able to make him go with me, but she could and she just had to chose our anniversary for that!" I couldn't handle it anymore and broke down into tears again.

"That bastard!" he cursed, cuddling me against his chest "I'll reap him into pieces! Please tell me you broke up with him then" he almost begged me.

"I did, I broke up with him this morning. I was so furious that I couldn't stop myself from shouting at him all the thing I had just told you, but in anger not sadness. He was shell shocked, I'll tell you that but it was worth it. I haven't felt so relived in years".

"I know what you mean, it happened the same to me when I finally told Kuchiki how I felt" he replied with a sad but comforting small smile "What will you do now?".

"As cowardly as it will sound, I will transfer Zero's afternoon hours to the early morning and I will work during lunch time. I just need a time without Toshiro's presence, you know?".

"I do, I will try to evade the sixth division for the same reason" he told me and then laughed hysterically "How pathetic we are".

"We are, aren't we?" I smiled sadly, snuggling closer to my best friend.

However, all that comfort and sense of safety went through the window as soon as I heard the sweet voice I thought I'd never hear again.

"Hiomi-neechan?" I looked up, from Renji's chest, and my heart stopped beating at the owner of the soft voice "Is it really you?".

"Ma petite fraise*..." I pushed my best friend away and rushed towards my little brother's side. I wrapped my arms around him and snuggled his head against my chest, which would have been impossible if Ichigo hadn't fallen into his knees. Given the fact that I died when I was in my last year of primary school which made my stature against the one of an eighteen years old boy ( _Yes, I keep note of how many years have passed since I've seen my family_ ) big "Oh Kami-sama, please tell me that you discovered your powers as a Shinigami and that's why you are here. And that it isn't the fact that you died young" I begged him.

"I am a substitute shinigami Hiomi-neechan, relax" he assured me, voice low as if he spoke louder would break the moment and make me vanish... as if I was a dream or illusion "Are you really here? Did I finally found you after three years of seeking you here?".

"Wait... are you that substitute shinigami who defeated Aizen and stopped Rukia's execution?" I questioned him, releasing I'm enough so I could see his face.

"Yes, I am" he answered shyly, as he would always do whenever he did something amazing and was waiting for my praise.

"I am so proud of you, ma petite fraise" I assured him, kissing both of his cheeks, forehead and nose, as I used to do when I was alive. Making him giggle as he used to do when we were little "Wait a minute... if you are _that_ shinigami... then... Renji!" I turned around rapidly, throwing a glare at my best friend "You knew he was my little brother all this time and never said anything?!" shouting or loosing my cool wasn't my thing, but I felt hurt and betrayed by my best friend so sue me.

"No!" he replied rapidly, scared for his life "You told me about your family before but never mentioned your last name! Now that I think about it, no one knows your last name. After all, you make everyone call you by your first name" he tried to excuse himself, but this time nothing was saving him for his stupidity.

"Maybe you didn't know my last name, but you knew I have a little brother called Ichigo, that my twin sisters names are Karin and Yuzu and that my father is Isshin. How could you have been so idiot to not connect the dots before!" I exclaimed angrily, really happy that there was no one this night at the café to see the emotional wreck show that I was putting.

"Sorry!" he apologized, jumping behind the counter to hide from me.

"Renji!" I was about to follow him and beat the crap out of him, but Ichigo stopped me by wrapping his arms around me and leaning his face on my back. That froze me, I knew those movements from anywhere, ma petite fraise is in pain "What is it little brother? Who hurt you?".

"Grimmjow..." was the mumbled response from Ichigo.

 _The Arrancar king?! What had you gotten into this time ma petite fraise?_ I thought in distress.


	4. Act I: Yumichika

"Yumichika! Stop!" Shuuhei called out for me, as he ran behind me. I didn't pay him any attention and just let my feet take me as far away from him as they could. Of course, he couldn't let me do what I wanted for once and had to flash step in front of me "What's gotten into you?!" he demanded to know with a confused frown.

"Ok! I've got enough!" I exclaimed angrily and frustrated at his obliviousness "Do you want to know what's wrong with me? YOU are what's wrong with me!".

"Wh... what the hell?!" he snapped at me this time angry, but I could see a bit of hurt in his eyes.

 _Good, maybe he'll feel a bit of the pain I have._ I thought malignantly.

"You know what, I told everyone what my zanpakuto does for you. I had to endure a complete month of solitude and cold shoulders from my friends and colleagues for that. Ikkaku almost kicked me out of our room in the eleventh division barracks because of the huge secret I kept hidden from him. All because for you!" I yelled at him, not caring that ugly tears were falling from my eyes or his wide open eyes were full of surprise and pain "You told me that I had no right to demand you to tell everyone that you are bisexual and dating me if I kept Ruri'iro Kujaku's nature a secret. So I said the truth, thinking that you would get a hint and we would be able to parade our love through the Soul Society. But I was wrong...".

"Yumi..." he murmured in shock, surely not costumed to see me so weak.

"Don't you dare!" I snapped at him eyes shinning, not only with my tears but also in anger "You have no right to call me that, we are over. Do you hear me? Over! I won't date a coward that let his friends get him to flirt with a slut like Rangiku because he was afraid that they'll find out that he is with a man! That is so unbeautiful. Hihi, it seems like you won't be having that fear anymore. Why don't you make us both a favour and get back to that bar and fuck Rangiku until you forget about me. Don't worry, it seems that it won't take much time" I pushed him away and tried to walk away. Keyword: tried. Shuuhei was the persistent idiot that he always is and grabbed my arm trying to stop me "Get off!" I shook him off "You tore my heart out tonight Shuuhei, you didn't do just that you also spat on it and dance a tango with Rangiku over it. Just let me go... please".

I hated to beg, I never beg, but I couldn't take it anymore. Taking the hint for once in his life, Shuuhei let me got. Or maybe he was shocked that I begged, I don't know and I don't care. I was just happy that I could flash step far away from him. Of course, I was so unlucky that night that my tears didn't let me see where I was going and bumped into someone.

"Ita!" the chibi one complained but then asked worriedly "Yumichika-san! Are you ok?!" the familiar and comforting voice of Hantarou brought me into tears once again. But this time instead of trying to swallow them I just jumped on the fourth division shinigami, who was considered like the mother figure of the eleventh division and a good friend of mine, and cried on his chest. As the amazing person he is, he let me cry quietly. Once I've finally calmed down he asked me calmly "Ready to tell me what's wrong?".

Hanatarou was one of the closest friends I've got and I trusted him completely, which is the principal reason why I started telling him everything. He was clearly shocked by my confession, but then it changed into a protective anger worth of a bear mother. No one but the eleventh division and those who dared to cross him have seen this side of Hanatarou, a side that isn't shy or hesitant but strong and secure. I am sure if I hadn't stop him right there and assured him that there was nothing to worry about anymore, I would have been notified tomorrow that Shuuhei was in bed rest for huge injuries very well placed. Because that's where Hanatarou's strength is, in his medical studies. He knows exactly where to hit to cause the exact effect he wants in his opponent, even if he isn't very strong physically he knows how much spiritual pressure to use for each hit. Also, he is quite wicked with the Surgical instruments when he wants to.

"I am going to a cafe that I go to a lot with Yachiru, it has the best sweets ever. Would you like to drown your sorrows in chocolate?" he offered me kindly as always.

"Yes, I'll need some chocolate" I reply. After a few minutes of walking in silence, I finally asked the queston that has been in my mind lately "What's wrong Hanatarou? Even if it's dark I've noticed your red puffy eyes".

"I... do... don't..."

"Speak" I cut him off.

"Ok" he sighed defeated and started talking.


	5. Act I: Hanatarou

_"Hey taichou! Why is that scum of the fourth division still here?" I stopped frozen, behind the door of the training room, when I heard the question of a shinigami of the eleventh division._

"Yeah, that idiot is so weak and _fragile_. He doesn't belong here, I still don't know how a coward like him was allowed to be a shinigami" another one commented.

 _"I still can't believe how he was allowed to enter the Academy! Must have slept with one of the officers, the only good thing he serves for is to be fucked" the first one retorted barking a cruel laugh, the second one soon following._

 _"He has a nice ass, doesn't he? Maybe we should pay him a visit tonight..."._

 _I didn't even hear the rest. I rushed far away, cheeks burning in embarrassment and eyes clouded by tears of shame. Running away in fear of being noticed by them, and causing that little visit much early. But what hurt the most was the ache in my heart by the fact that Zaraki-taichou didn't say anything, that he didn't defend me... maybe he thinks like them._

 _I couldn't believe how they could treat me like this after all I did for them. After caring from them as if they were family since the moment my taichou elected me to take care of the eleventh division. I made my best effort to be part of this big family, liking how united they were in comparison of the other division. I thought I was finally part of it... I was wrong._

 _I bumped into someone as I left the building, but I ignored the squeak in favor of continuing running away. After all that's all I'm good for..._

"They said what?!" exclaimed a furious Yumichika, ready to murder whoever they were "I am reaping them into pieces".

"Don't" was my only reply, soft and weak... as always.

"They threatened to rape you Hanatarou!" he snapped at me angrily "I can't believe taichou just stood there and let them talk about you like that!" this time I couldn't stop a sob of sadness from coming out from my lips "Oh, Hanatarou..." he sighed sadly, wrapping his arms around me and dragging me into a strong and comforting hug "You love taichou, don't you?".

"I ju... just wanted hi... him to notice m... me, to see mo... more than just a we... weak member from th... the fourth division tha... that he hates so mu... much" I cried into his chest "I gu... guess I wa... was wr... wrong!".

"Come on Hanatarou, let's go to that cafe. It seems like we both need a lot of chocolate" he commented with a tired sigh.

Luckily we were only a few blocks from the place. However, instead of calming down as I always do in this place, I jumped startled by the unpredictable shout of Hiromi-chan. She never shouts!

"I am so killing that blue bastard panther! I don't care that he is the Arrancar King, he will die by my hands!" I blinked a few times and exchanged a confused look with Yumichika, both thinking the same thing: _What is going on here?_ "Hanatarou! Welcome back! Where is Yachiru? I adore that little girl!" she welcomed us as soon as she noticed our presence, making me sweat drop at how weird is her mood.

"Hi Hiromi, Yachiru is probably in her room" I answered, forcing a small smile. One which tired me more than any crying I did before "I came today with a friend".

"Let me guess, you want chocolate to help you drown your broken hearts" she stated, surprising us both. _How did she know?!_ "Welcome to the club!" she greeted us with false excitement "We are all suffering from the same problem. Why don't you both sit down while I prepare some tea and chocolate sweets for us. It's in the house tonight. Then we can tell each other our problems and complain without caring for anything" she suggested.

Not having nothing better to do I accepted. And who would have imagined it? Abarai-taichou in love with his ex-captain and Ichigo having sex with the Arrancar king. What shocked me the most was Hiromi-chan being Ichigo's defunted dead sister and breaking up with Hitsugaya-taichou. They did such a great couple, I would have never thought they had those kind of problems. Then again I am mostly of the time wrong, why wouldn't this be another time?


	6. Act I: Grimmjow

**_"I love you, son if a bitch! That is what is wrong with me!"_**

 ** _"I am only a game for you, a toy to use whenever you are bored"_**

 ** _"I can't keep on doing this not anymore"_**

 ** _"You can't finish something that never started"_**

"Grimmjow!" Halibel yelled snapping me out of my thoughts.

I raised my gaze from the paperwork on my lap and looked at her with a boring expression, trying to conceal how much Berry's words affected me. They had been ringing in my head repeatedly these last couple of days. I chuckled humourlessly, if he only knew what he meant to me... How his strength and beauty in combat took my breath away, making me want to be better so he can see what a worthy mate I could be. Not only by getting stronger, but by showing him that I could be a good person/hollow as well. That _he_ is the reason why the hollow activity as decreased in Karakura. That everything I wanted since I woke up from Aizen's control was to have _him_. At the beginning I thought that if I could have him only physically then I would be fine, but then I began craving more and more from him.

No... at the beginning I thought the same way that Ichigo did. I believed that I only wanted his body, that he was only a... a toy for me. And everything I did was so I could have more possibilities of using his delicious body. However, hearing him say the lies I told myself over and over again without believing them at all... woke me up for a second time. However, this time not from any mind control but from my own lies. I discovered that I do have a heart, one that only desires Berry and that broke when I saw his tear stained face as the gates to the soul society closed.

"It seems that he is spacing again" Stark commented in his absentmindedly way, but there was a hint of concern that got my attention and made me smirk in pride. Even when Aizen had us under his control he never got us to care about him, we weren't anything but weapons at his disposal. Now... now we are a family, a strange and mismatched one but a family at least.

"Well, he needs to snap out of it soon and come to my laboratory. We all need to see this immediately!" Szayel demanded from the speakers he installed all over the castle.

I looked at both of my Espadas, the three of us were confused of what had Szayel so stressed out, which was very unlike him. So we all rushed to the laboratory, when I say all I mean the whole castle, we expected to find enemies attacking or something like that. However, we found something even worse.

We found _them_...

 **A/N: Sorry but this chapter is short.**


	7. Act I: Byakuya

"Oni-sama, please talk to me" my sweet Rukia pleaded as soon as I returned to the Kuchiki mansion, ambushing me before I could lock myself in my office.

That's what I have been doing these last couple of days, doing my work as a captain, yelling and working my division until they bled, then locking myself in my office to work myself until exhaustion. Because if I didn't do that I would cry myself to sleep, and as the Kuchiki head of my family I could not cry... for no one. Not even when everything I touch ends up breaking: Hisana, Renji... and soon surely Rukia. That's why I tried my best to get away from her, so that she won't end up suffering as her best friend did.

"What's wrong Oni-sama? This is not like you at all... Is this about Renji turning into a captain?" I unwittingly flinched, it was only for a second and just because she caught me off guard. However, for someone who knew me so much as Rukia and... Renji, they would have noticed it immediately "So it has to do with Renji... did he finally confess to you?" my head snapped towards her "You really thought that no one knew about that?" she slightly smirked, surely happy to see that she caught on something before her big brother "It's not as if everyone knows... but people caught on his yearning gazes towards you, and his unflinching loyalty to you. It was a surprise to all of us who knew about his feelings when he accepted to go through the captain test, we all know how much he loves working for you... especially since he can be close to you. But this isn't about him confessing, is it?" she asked sadly.

"He gave up on me... as everyone does" I confessed softly. I normally would have snapped and demanded to be left alone, but being left by the one I always thought would never leave me... was the last drop I needed to admit I need to talk to someone. And that someone being someone I trust, like Rukia "What should I do now?".

"Do you love him?" she asked, a question that didn't popped into my head. Not even after two fully days asking myself everything but anything at the same time.

 _Did I love Renji?_ I thought of all those times he stood by me, trusting me blindly no matter what I did. Always believing that I had a good reason behind my actions. Always striving to be better, to gain my approval... one that I never gave him. How just by his presence I felt myself relax and know that everything will be fine... because we are the best team and we never lose. How whenever we fight side by side I don't even think about checking my blind spots constantly, for I know he always has my back. How he knows me so well that he always knows when something is wrong.

However, that doesn't mean I love him. All that would make me appreciate him as a lieutenant... as a brother. But not as a lover, not as I loved Hisana. Suddenly I thought about what made me love Hisana in the first place, she loved _me_ not Byakuya Kuchiki. But even then I never was able to be truly free with her, cause she needed me strong with how ill she was. Also, we didn't have enough time together for that. But with Renji I did... he didn't need me to be strong, he just needed _me_. He admires _me_. He trusts _me_. He follows _me_. Not the head of the Kuchiki family, nor the captain of the sixth division. He loves _me_.

No... he _loved_ me.

And that hurt more than I ever thought possibly, because... I _love_ him.

"Oni-sama" Rukia sighed sadly, getting closer to whip softly the solitary tear that I didn't know I had shed with her thumb "So that's my answer" she said softly "As for yours... tell him how you feel. He was brave enough to confess and to stay by your side all this time. I believe that he deserves for you to tell him the truth and for you to fight with the Kuchiki elders for him".

"He will not take me back" I stated grimly.

"Then you are a fool Oni-sama" I was shocked by her disrespect, she never talked to me like this "Renji loved you for so much time, even though he gave up on you that doesn't mean he suddenly doesn't love you anymore. It takes time for that to happen, sometimes it never happens. Just show him that you are serious and that you are willing to change for him, he will understand and accept you. It might take time... but he did wait for a long while. It is your time now".

"You have grown into such a wise woman" I told her.

Our conversation was cut short when I received a Hell Butterfly, informing me that I was urgently needed in the office of the general commander. Knowing that the rest of the conversation needed to wait, I bid Rukia goodbye and flash stepped towards there. I wasn't even surprise when every other captain of the Gotei 13 was there, all but Renji. I discreetly looked around the room, thinking that I might have not seen him the first time. But it was no use, I couldn't even feel his riatsu in the building.

"Don't wait for Abarai-taichou he is in a mission right now" Genryūsai-taichou told us.

"So, why the hell are we here?! Let's better cut this short, I have more important things to do right now" we all rolled our eyes at the usual disrespect of Zaraki-taichou. However, I could note that this time it wasn't in his usual I-care-for-nothing tone, but he was quite... nervous? Worried? What could have gotten him like that?

"We are here because Kuchiki-taichou had important news for us" Genryūsai-taichou answered not even caring about Zaraki-taichou by now.

"What? I was called here by you Genryūsai-taichou" by my reply everyone got defensive "Who called us all here?" I asked the question everyone was thinking.

Suddenly every window and door in the room got closed, sealing us inside. We all got our zanpaktous out and were ready for an attack. However, the only thing that came was huge ball of light in middle of the room. It was blinding at first, but then when you looked at it more closely you could see the image of someone inside. So I looked more carefully, blood running cold when I recognize who they were... **The Zodiacs** **!**


	8. Act I: Toshiro

"Excuse me" I called out for the boy working in Hiromi's café.

I've never seen him before, which shouldn't be a surprise as I always come here very early and the only one working is my girl… ex-girlfriend. But not today, today there is a very attractive young man working in Hiromi's place. I knew that I didn't deserve to feel this jealous, not after everything I've done to her, but I can't stop the green eye monster from coming out when I think of the love of my life working side by side with _him_. He was tall and attractive, doesn't look as a little boy as well.

"Yes, sir?" He replied.

"Where is Hiromi?" I asked him, going to the point rapidly.

"She went away, she has to recollect the right herbs to make her special tea and the right ingredients to make her homemade sweets. We ran out of them, I would normally do that but she wanted to take some time off of the café" he answered politely. His words were like daggers in my heart, because of me she ran away from the café she loves and the clients she adores "Something else?".

"No" I told him "Thank you" with that said I left the café and headed to my division.

I still recall her words full of pain and sorrow, all brought by me. The worst was her shocked face when I accused her of being an envious and jealous bitch. How could I say something like that to the person I love the most in my life?! I didn't even notice what a horrible boyfriend I've been until she broke up with me, after slapping me _hard_ , and the scolding I received from Hyorinmaru. Now I have to wait until she returns to gain her forgiveness.

Not only that I had a huge fight with Hinamori-fukotaichou when she barged into my office and stated that I was going to help her out, without even asking! I was already devastated by my break up, and some part of me blamed her, the one I consider as a sister, to blame for all my problems. So, the first thing I did was yell at her and accused her of getting between Hiromi and me. That got me a tearful Momo running out of my office and another scolding from Hyorinmaru.

All thoughts of Hiromi I was forced to put in the back of my head when I received the hell butterfly from Yamamoto-taichou. However, when I got to his office the last thing I expected was to find that we were now facing a new enemy, the legend: **The zodiacs**.

" _Bonjour Gotei 13 and Hueco Mundo! You surely must be asking yourselves how were we able to imprison you when we aren't even in the Soul Society or Hueco Mundo? Or even better… how are we alive? Many of you don't know about us, we are only a legend told to scare the little ones. We are the only enemy, before Aizen, that got the Hollows and Shinigamis to work together… and that caused the deaths of thousands, even the deaths of five of our members. We didn't die all. No, we just relocated and planned. Now you are all our prisoners, you will watch and suffer as we reveal all your dark secrets to the five persons that changed the lives of the society and mean something for you all. We will turn them into zodiacs and then we will come for you all… and we'll kill you all"._

The maniacal dark laugh he had afterwards was so cliché that I was angry at myself, when I shivered in fear because of it. Then the image changed from **The zodiacs** to a group of four shinigamis and a woman. They were Kurosaki-san, Abarai-taichou, Ayasegawa-fukotaichou, Yamada-san and… no… no, it can't be… _Hiromi!_


	9. Act I: Shuhei

_I'm a coward, that's what I am._ I thought sadly as I entered the ninth division.

I had a restless night yesterday, Yumichika's disgusted expression hunted me in my sleep. His words prevented me from sleeping, more than once I had found myself waking up screaming to my boy... ex-boyfriend to not leave me. However, why would he do that when I cheated on him as I did, not only because I flirted with Matsumoto-fukotaicho. But also, because I lured him with empty promises into a position where he had his family turning his back on him. While I, on the other hand, left unharmed and broke my word.

What's worse is that I just found out that things were so bad in the eleventh division for Yumichika that he had to put a request for transfer. This morning while heading towards here I overheard some shinigamis talking about how surprised they were when they found out that a fourth seat got Renji's unoccupied place in the sixth squad. That was a low blow.

Kazeshini has always been right... not only I am a coward when it comes to accept myself, but I also am afraid of what people say about me. Principal reason why I can't admit to anyone of my feelings for Yumichika. Goodness for years I didn't want to admit them to myself! But he saw right threw me, broke down the walls I built around me to deceive the rest into believing that I was strong... that I wasn't afraid of anything. But in reality I am scared of myself...

However, right now my fear isn't centred on me, but on my love. If being held prisoner in my own division wasn't enough, my ex being played by the legendary zodiacs is. I've heard all about them, how they were a group of shinigamis and hollows that believed peace could be achieved between our kinds. As expected they were banished and looked down upon. But during those years they recruited people, creating an army. Their power grew immensely... and they finally attacked with the objective of conquering both words. Of shaping the Hueco Mundo and Soul Society into their idea of the perfect empire. That was the first time that shinigamis and huecos worked together, and we won the war believing that they were exterminated... it seems that we were wrong.

 _But that's the least of my worries right now._ I thought desperately. _I have to find a way to get the hell out of here and go find Yumichika. It's the least I can do for him, I have to save him from **them**!_


	10. Act I: Kenpachi

Not even when I had two dead bodies in my office did my rage decrease, if anything I only felt even more protective and angry.

 _How could these pieces of shit talk like that of their 'mother'?!_ I screamed in my head furiously. _Hana doesn't only take care of us when we get hurt, but also cook for us, gives us emotional support and good advices. He is more importantly MINE! Something that I don't bother to hide and flaunt as much as possible by dragging him on my lap whenever the eleventh division gathers together, by taking him with my Yachiru in our back rides around the Gotei 13. Also, by molesting him as much as possible in front of people so they know that they have to BACK THE HELL OFF! He belongs to me, and I make sure anyone who dares to THINK that they have a chance with him to end in the fourth division. For extra precaution I leave clear marks on his neck, so when he visits the town those pitiful souls will know he is taken._

"Ken-chan!" exclaimed a typically cheerful Yachiru, jumping on my back "Oh... they are dead" she commented nonchalantly, she was used to this already "Was this why Oka-san ran away earlier?".

My previous anger that had vanished as soon as I heard the voice of the one I love as a daughter returned as soon as I processed the words that left her mouth "What?!" I snarled. Not even her calling MY Hana Oka-san, something that I loved and encouraged since the very beginning, helped to calm my blood lust.

"Yes, I had just came from a mission and saw him standing outside your office. I ran towards him so he could help me write my report when he dashed away! He was in such a hurry that he bumped into me and didn't notice who I was! Oka-san doesn't like to fight, so the bodies must have scared him off" she explained to me, completely oblivious that we might have just lost the 'mother' of our family.

 _Did he hear what those men said? Did he stay to see that I defended him and terminated the problem? Or did he ran away before and thinks that I planned to help these pieces of shit rape him?_ Those were the questions that were in my head as I angrily tore threw Gotei 13 and the village nearby in search of Hana.

Of course, I didn't find him and to add to my bad luck I was forced to assist to an idiotic meeting in the old man's office that got us all captured by some FUCKING group of bastards that will be dead as soon as I get my hands on them. Because if there is something that people don't get, no matter how hard I try to show the whole world, is that Hana is MINE!


	11. Act II: Toushirou

**_"Can you explain to me why are you allowing Hiromi to come with us?!" Kurosaki exclaimed, angrily, to Abarai-taichou._**

I would normally be against such show of disrespect, but I myself was furious at such rush decision. Why was he putting a civilian in danger?! Why did it have to be Hiromi?

 ** _"Little brother, did you really think you were the only one who daddy passed his shinigami genes to?" Everyone in the room froze, barely breathing._**

Did we hear correctly? The famous substitute shinigami and the cook/advisir that had won everyone heart are siblings?! Why did she never tell me such important fact?... now that I think about it, she had never revealed her last name.

 ** _"Wait a second… you are a shinigami as well?!" Kurosaki shouted, as shocked as everyone in the room._**

 ** _ **"No, I'm not. Being a shinigami is a jo** b, a job you have to be hired for. I never went to the academy or tried to become a shinigami. I never had any desire to, really. When I… died what I wanted to do is fullfil the dream I couldn't while alive. And I did, I have my own café/restaurant. Which is pretty famous if I may say" Hiromi confessed "But I know how to fight and I have a zanpakto. Dad passed his abilities to us, but it dimmed with each child. That's why while Karin can see ghosts she will never be able to access her abilities as a shinigami and Yuzu can only sense them close or hear them speak"_**

 ** _"Wait… if it dimmed with each child… and you are the oldest… does that mean that you are stronger than Ichigo?!" Ayasegawa-fukotaichou inquired._**

"Those are very good analyzing qualities" Ukitake commented "You got a good fukotaichou there, Byakuya"

 ** _"I am" Hiromi replied, stunning us once again "I woke up my abilities as a shinigami while I was alive, without the help of any shinigami like you needed. That's how I met Renji really, he was the shinigami in charge of our city. Kami was he shocked when he saw me!"_**

 ** _"Of course I was shocked! The last I expected when I got to the human world was to see a human fighting off hollows!" Abarai exclaimed, a big fond grin on his face._**

"What?!" Almost all of us exclaimed, stunned by the surreal situation.

What was goin on?!

 ** _"But how were you able to find hollows? You didn't have our sensors to tell you where and when a breach would open" a guy from the fourth division quesioned._**

 ** _"She does not need such a thing" scoffed Abarai-taichou "She herself is the best sensor there is. She is incredibly synchronized with the spiritual energy, in herself and in her surroundings. She could sense an hollow coming from miles away. Which is also why she is the best when it comes to Kido. She can cast Kido from level 90 to below without the need of a spell. She is a genius of Kido!" He bragged._**

While the team outside the Gotei was impressed by the n ew piece of information, t he taichous in the room were stunned to silence. But this wasn't the kind of shock we got at the realization she has a zanpaktou. No, this is the kind of silence where everyone is serious- even Kenpachi.

"Even I have trouble using Kido above level 75. Not to mention the fact that it would be close to impossible to do them without casting a spell" Ukatake muttered, not processing what was going on "That girl isn't just good, she is genius level. Even above Hitsugaya's level. She is not even half a century old!"

"She is a monster!" Kenapachi smiled, sinister "At least, we know that they will be safe with her by their side" I looked at the captain surprised that he cared about anyone but his fukotaichou and himself. But then again his ex-fifth seat was there and I had seen him dragging that poor fourth division shinigami around "I feel all pumped up now! I want to fight her!"

"Enough!" Yamamoto-dono exclaimed "This is not time for games! We are under attack of **The Zodiacs** and we have an unkown fighter out there who has a captain level without any proper training. This whole situation… is a disaster"

"She is no danger to us, Yamamoto-dono. She is a good girl and you heard her, she has no desire to fight but simpky bring smiles to people's faces with her food and sweets" I tried to defend my girlfr… ex-girlfriend "The only reason she is there right now is to help her brother out"

"You seem pretty sure" Yamamoto-dono said, looking at me suspiciously "What is your relationship with that girl?" He demanded to know.

"She… used to be my lover. The break up is still new" I confessed, knowing better than to lie. I ignored the looks of surprise and, specially, the pity ones "I was not aware that she was so strong, then again she rarely talks about her life when she was alive. And if my suspicions are right, her death came by the hand of a hollow. I don't blame her for not wanting to revive those memories"

"As long as you did not withhold such important piece of information I believe it is all right" Yamamoto-dono sighed "Let's just hope they know what they are doing"

 ** _"Onee-chan! You are beast! Why are not a taichou by now?!" Kurosaki exclaimed, beaming with pride._**

His exclamation had me turning my attention back to the screen **The Zodiacs** had given us. Quite a strange expression to see the usual scowling boy with so much childish happiness. Then again he did lose both mother and sister very young, from what I've heard.

 ** _"I have been telling her that for years now" huffed Abarai-taichou, scowling at Hiromi._**

 ** _"Because I don't like the way they manage their work. They are curropted, I prefer being a vigilante really" replied Hiromi, making me chuckle- that's very Hiromi like._**

 ** _"I do remember that" chuckled Abarai-taichou " The men killer, quite a legend really"_**

Another moment of silence passed in the room, before the gelid voice of the Captain-Commander resonated through the walls: "Are you telling me that **The men killer** has been hiding under our noses the whole time and no one knew it!"

 _Oh boy, these next few days will be long._ I thought tiredly as I watched Yamamoto-dono rage. _At least, my worries about Hiromi's safety had calmed down. I just wonder why had she never told me anything of this._


	12. Act II: Hiromi

**Hiromi** :

"We are quite a messed up group, aren't we?" I commented, as I looked around the table. My café has always been a homey place, but never as much as right now. But the reasoning not very good "Maybe we should create the Club of the Rejected" I joked, though I did not expect them to go for it.

"We totally should!" the usual shy Hanatarou exclaimed, raising his chocolate cup high. When he hiccupped and started giggling like a mad man I knew he was high in chocolate "Yumi-chan! You are up for it, aren't you?"

"Of course, mamma!" it looks like Ayasegawa-fukotaichou also had already had enough sugar.

"My onee-chan always has the best ideas!" My petit fraise shouted, throwing himself at me and making us both fall on the floor.

 _What the hell? No one here can hold their chocolate?! Aren't they supposed to be top notch shinigamis!_ I yelled inside my head and glared at Renji, who simply stared blatantly at me and laughing at my expense. _I will have my sweet revenge soon. You better sleep with an eye open Renji._ I knew my message was received loud and clear when my best friend shivered, scared. _I am not known as **The Man Killer** for nothing._

Soon all the chaos ceased when a black butterfly appeared inside Famille. Everyone knew who was it for and what it meant. But the details… well, that's only for Renji to know. I was ready to turn a blind eye to it all and ready myself to bid him goodbye. Though, when Renji suddenly grimed and a dark aura covered the room, I prepared myself for the worse. I was pretty worried, Renji almost never reacted like this. It had only ever happened three times before: when I had died, when his childhood friend had gotten sentenced to death and when he had thought Kuchiki-taichou had dies after fighting his zampaktou.

"Renji, what's wrong?" I demanded, once the butterfly had disappeared.

" **The Zodiacs** had regrouped after all these years and decided to strike on the red zone, they had taken possession of those lands" Renji announced grimly, making us all gasp in shock… well, almost everyone.

"The red zone?!" Yumichika exclaimed, eyes shining with clear worry. Rumor says he comes from there, no wonder he is so worried.

"Who are **The Zodiacs**?! Are they strong?" my little brother asked impatiently, not liking being out of loop.

"They were a group of shinigamis and hollows that believed peace could be achieved between our kinds" I began telling him "Their intentions weren't really bad, but it all got screwed up when they were banished and looked down upon. However, during all those years in banishment they didn´t simply twiddle their thumbs. They recruited people, creating a big and powerful army. Their power grew immensely until it reached a point they decided they were ready... ready to conquer both words. They wanted to shape the Hueco Mundo and the Gotei 13 at their image, creating a perfectly unify world. I kind of like the principles they stand for… but…"

"The way they decided to make it real, wasn't right" Renji helped me out "Their army was quite impressive indeed. After all, it was the first time that shinigamis and huecos worked together, it almost ended up with our extinction... the only captain of the time that lived was Yamamoto-dono"

"The old man?!" Ichigo exclaimed, but shutting up when I glared at him- I taught him better to respect his elders.

"Yes, him. We all thought that they gone… but it seems like we were wrong" Renji sighed "They told me to arm a group and go there, the orders were to save the civilians not to defeat **The Zodiacs** "

"Of course, those aren't the orders. Otherwise, it would be a suicide mission" I scoffed, trying to mask my worry… and guilt "I will join you during this task, it will be like old times"

"What has gotten into you?" Renji asked me suspiciously "I've been trying to get you to join the shinigamis for years now and out of the blue you are eager to join during a mission. Yeah right!"

"Renji, I don't think you really get it" I replied, trying to keep my mask up and internally trying to calm myself down " **The Zodiacs** are the real deal and even though you are not ordered to fight them, at one moment you guys are going to clash. And you will need me when that happens, you will need **The Men Killer** " I ignored the gasped of shock coming from Yamada and Yumichika "Also, my best friend is going there… and from my Ichigo's look, my little brother as well. I am not going to lose any of you to those bastards. So, you better accept it"

"I get it" Renji sighed, before facing Yamada and Yumichika "What about you guys? Having a fukotaichou and a medic will be of great advantage"

"Hai taichou!" both replied, determination in their eyes.

It made the guilt inside of me worse. Everyone in this group was going into this suicide mission out of the goodness of their heart, while I was doing it out of selfishness. But as long as I get **The Zodiacs** to keep their mouths shut I will do anything. I can't let my secret to be known.

It will totally destroy Renji…


	13. Act II: Byakuya

**Byakuya:**

In my entire life, I've never felt more betrayed than right now. Right in front of me, through the screen, I was watching the man who claimed to love me strolling with the same criminal the sixth division had been hunting down for years. All this time, the reason for the only failure my division faced since I became captain was because I was being betrayed from the inside. It tore through me like a zampaktou had just ran through my heart. I simply wanted curl into myself and cry from the pain it caused me, surprisingly I had no desire to punish him for betraying me, my division and the Gotei 13.

 _It was karma, for all the suffering I've made him go through all these years. I t_ hought, with a bittersweet smile.

It was as if this whole situation was mocking me. The one who has always been there for me and never doubted me, my last chance for happiness... he was right there, in front of me but I never really saw him. Now karma was bitting me in the ass- excuse my crude language.

 ** _"Why being T he Men Killer is such a big thing?"_** Kurosaki-san question snapped my out of my self-pity and made me face the screen once again, only to feel a pang in my heart at how close Renji was to the woman that had secured over a hundred men.

 _ **"Otouto, when I died... well, my death was violent which kind of fractured my soul" she confessed "My idealism and principles got twisted, so i turned from a hero to a vigilante"**_

 _ **"You've heard about how the Red Zone is the worst in the whole place, don't you?" my new fuko-taichou continued "Some shinigami planned to take over the place and become rich and powerful. However, the place is so out of control that they were unable to turn that place into the ideal town they wanted. So, they chose to pass those plans to the second worse zone... but they were not expecting a civilian there with a zanpaktou as powerful as the taichous"**_

 ** _"Onee-chan is that powerful" Kurosaki-san exclaimed, eyes glimmering with wonder "Amazing! Wait... a broken soul! Are you better onee-chan?! What happened that night that made you go rouge?"_**

That's a question we all ask ourselves and the only reason why her hunt is still one. The Gotei 13 had no idea of the atrocities our shinigamis were doing, so when we heard that some civilian was hunting down shinigamis we entered in action. I, myself, sent Renji there to represent the sixth division, as always he made me proud. He was the one who lead the team we sent and discovered why the people there were hiding and protecting the woman. He found out about the extortion, rape, theft, abuse, fear, violence those monsters inflicted on the people they had swore to protect when they graduated from the Academy.

The only thing he failed to achieve was learn who The Men Killer was, that's why the hunt on her went on. We can't leave someone unstable and so powerful loose. As what she did was only protect those that needed help, we were not planning on jailing her but help her instead- maybe even have her into our ranks. Renji knew that, which leads me to my next question.

 _Why did he hid her then? What was the propose of all this hid and seek?_

 ** _"What's more important, why did you lie to the taichous?!" exclaimed Hanatarou-san, I did not know the boy much but that outburst of his I believe is very ** _uncheristically "They can have your head for that!"_**_**

That's right... which also worries me.

 ** _"It's... you don't understand" Renji sighed, a look of pure anguish showing on his face._**

 _That look... it's the same one he gave me last night. What could have happened that broke his heart._ I thought worriedly, my heart aching for the one I love. I hate seeing him suffer, even when I was still blind and would have never been able to admit it; all I ever wanted was for him to smile. _Whatever it is, must have been big. Renji is, after all, the strongest person I know._

 **" _Renji" that bitch murmured sadly, touching his arm gently._**

 _Does she not understand in what situation she landed Renji?!_ I exclaimed in my head angrily, wanting nothing more than to rip that hand off **_my_** man's arm. _Wait... my man?_

Suddenly the room's temperature decreased, we all turned towards Histugaya-taichou. Only to find him giving a frosty glare to Renji on the screen.

 _Oh, right._ _He used to date **The Men Killer**._ I realized. _He seems to not be over their break up yet. At least, I feel better knowing that someone was on the same situation as me._

 ** _"The reason why I covered up for her and did not question her reasons, goes further than simple being best friends... it's because I owed her a big one"_**

 ** _"You owed her?" Hanatarou-san said_** ** _softly, almost motherly; this time much calmer than before._**

 ** _"Yeah..." he said lamely, grimly looking down- his bangs covering his face "After all, I was the one who killed her"_**

Pure silence rang at both sides.

 _What did he just say?!_


	14. Act II: Renji

**Renji:**

I still remember the day that I met her, as if it was yesterday:

 _"Damn it! From all the things I could have been in charge of is protecting this stupid city" I grumbled, as I jumped from building to building "I will never anger Byakuya-taichou again on my life. I can't believe I have to stay here for five years" I sighed, resigning myself to my fate "This will be boring as hell"_

 _"I resent that" a soft but firm voice said behind me._

 _I rapidly turned around, reading myself for an attack, but froze in shock at what I found._

"How cana human use kido?!" I exclaimed stunned by the whole situation.

"You are not a normal ghost, they normally don't carry swords around… and you are not a demon either" she totally ignored me while thinking out loud.

"Demon?!" I growled, even more confused- what is a demon? Humans and their strange costumes.

"Those black spiritual creatures with creepy masks" she explained.

"Black creatures with masks… you mean hollows? Are you telling me that the reason why this city had had so little hollow activity is because of a human?!" I almost laughed at the ridiculous situation I found myself in, if I weren't shocked as fuck.

"So they are called hollows…" she mumbled "And you? What are you?"

"I'm a shinigami" I replied "I hunt those… demons, between other things"

"Well, your kind has not been doing a great job lately" she said.

I looked at her for a few minutes, before throwing my head back and laughing joyfully. Maybe being in this human city would not be so boring. I thought happily.

"I like you girl" I said, not minding anymore being tied up. But was surprised when I soon found myself being realized "What? Finally trusting me? That easy? That will get you killed" I warned.

"I am very good at sensing spiritual energies, be it bad or good. I feel no ill intentions from you. I apologize for trapping you, but I felt an unknown energy and reacted before thinking"

"Have someone to protect here?" I asked, curiously, and raised an eyebrow when her stance change- getting into a defensive position and gathering kido in her hands, ready to trap me again at any moment.

"Do you know girl what you just did? You used kido and casted spells without even chanting anything. That is pure talent. Even graduated shinigamis have a hard time doing it" suddenly and idea occurred to me "I have a lot of time to kill here, what do you say I teach you about the spiritual world and how to fight better?"

"Why would you do that? You don't even know me"

"I am too strong, this hollows will only bore me. I need some entertainment, also you can always become a shinigami when you die" I replied.

"Wow… how kind of you?" She replied, tone dripping with sarcasm.

"But you will be capable of protecting that special someone" I continued, shutting her up.

Suddenly some kind of bells began to ring, snapping her out of her thinking.

"Stay here, and in an hour find me by the door. I will give you an answer then" she finally said, before turning around and skipping away.

I had no obligation of doing as she told me, but she was an interesting girl and I wanted to know more about her. With nothing more to do I decided to stalk investigate the girl I just offered to train. It seems that this building is a place young people go to study and those strange outfits are uniforms they must wear- just like Rukia and I did in our Academy time. From what I could see, this girl was very smart and looked up by her peers- she must be their lieder or something like that. When people started to come out, I decided to use a gigai. After all, most humans cannot see us shinigamis. I even used one of those strange suits I saw some senseis wearing.

It took a few minutes, minutes that many girls stole glances at me while blushing and giggling, but that girl finally came out… but she wasn't on her own. She had a little boy that was clearly her little brother. She looked stunned by my change of clothes and more when her friend asked her if she knew me, I smirked and winked at her when she whipped her head towards me- having the upper hand feels good. She quickly bid her friend goodbye and dragged her little brother towards me, the other guy glared heatedly at me.

I raised and eyebrow confused by the attitude, but then I understood: _Oh, he must have a crush on her. He sees me as a threat._

"Nee-san, who is he?" A small adorable voice, snapped me out of my thoughts. I looked down at the little boy gripping his big sisters skirt, hiding behind her leg.

 _So cute~!_ I squealed in my head.

"Ma petit fraise he is a friend of mine. He will be escorting us home" she answered, her voice filled with adoration and her expression gentle as a saint mother "Why don't you go in front of us while I talk with him?"

The boy didn't even ask why, he simply beamed at her and skipped in front of us. What a good behaved boy… he also trusts his sister blindly.

"How..." she began, but knowing what she was going to say I cut her off.

"We shinigamis have our ways. I will explain everything if you accept my offer" I replied.

"That boy over there is my little brother, our mother died a few months ago... a hollow killed her. A hollow that decieved my otouto. He can see them like me, though he can't use kido while alive like me. My dad said that once he dies he will have the ability to become a reaper... sorry, a shinigami. But I hope that does not happen in a long time, until then I want to become strong enough to protect them" she took a deep breath and looked at me in the eyes "Train me"

I knew then, that this stopped being a game for my amusement. This now was serious, a life or death situation. She was trusting me the life of her adored little brother... I could not take things easy anymore. So I called Rukia and asked her for all her academy books for kido and history of the Gotei 13 and Hueco Mundo. Though, those she had to study and learn on her own as I never excelled on those areas. When it came to katana training, well, on that I had her working like a dog. Not to mention that her endurance and speed was shit. Though when I was over with her with her she was almost good enough to match me. She never was capable of getting a zampaktou, though that was expected as she was still alive.

But I never stopped to wonder if that night would have been different if she had had a zampaktou:

That night it had been the day her boyfriend, the same boy that was with her the day I met her, broke up with her. She was very sad, so I did the only thing I knew would always cheer her up: I took her out to dance. And we dance! We cared for nothing and no one that night, we simply had fun loosing ourselves to the music and into each other's body. We left the club a couple of hours before the sun came out.

Hiromi decided to go to the temple at the top of the mountain, the place that has become so important to us- our training sanctuary and where our friendship bloom. We were having a great night... until _it_ happened. I acted like an unexperienced shinigami and put my guard down, that was all that hollow needed to attack.

Hiromi pushed me away all I could do is fall as I watched my best friend's heart being ripped out of her body by that hollow. That horrendous experience was all I needed for me to unblock my bankai mode. I blew that hollow into pieces... but it was too late.

Hiromi was dead, my best friend was dead, I could not comprehend what was happening, it was all too much...

All I could do was cradle her body into my arms and cry all morning long, until her father finally came. I've never felt so guilty before in my entire life, whenI saw his face crumpling and falling on his knees.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry!" I cried apologizing, over and over again "I'm so sorry!"


	15. Act II: Kenpachi

**Kenpachi:**

Everyone was quiet. This memory stunned us all. Specially, that bratty taichou-who had just saw his loved one die- and that stick in the ass Byakuya- who saw his ex-fukotaichou break in front of him. I myself was shocked by the whole situation. Renji, after all, used to be part of my unit. He never hid his emotions, always an open book... but no matter the situation he was put in he never broke like this. He must have really loved her.

"Isshin!" We all turned to the old man in shock "There is no mistake! That is Isshin, my son!"

Now what?! If that guy is the old man's son and he is that girl and Ichigo's father that mean that...

"Ichigo/Hiromi is your grandson/granddaughter?!" We all shouted, not believing what was just revealed.

"I have two grandchildren" the old man whispered, uncharastically stunned.

"Yamamoto-Done, you have four grandchildren" the bratty taichou corrected, hesitantly.

"Four?!" I did a double take, the old man seemed... happy...

 _Na, that's impossible!_ I scoffed in my head.

"Are the other two shinigamis as well?"

"No. They are two twin girls. The older one can only sense and see spirits, while the youngest can only sense and hear them. It seems that with each child the spiritual power that got inherit from the father lessened" that bratty taichou explained.

"Wait, doesn't that mean that the girl over there is stronger than Ichigo?" I suddenly asked, immersing the room into another round of silence.

"My grandchildren are already at a taichou level... they are going to be the greatest shin obi Gotei 13 ever saw!" he exclaimed, a proud smile decorating his face- shocking us all, _again_.

"He does remember that they were both wanted as criminals once upon a time by the Goteu 13, doesn't he?" I commented, lightly, mostly to myself but if a few taichous heard and chuckled... well, that's not my problem.

"Excuse me, Yamamoto-dono, but why did you sound so surprise to have found your son?" Byakuya asked the old man.

I normally would grumble at how polite like the idiot was acting, but I felt too curious right now for that.

"My son used to be a captain during the fight against The Zodiacs... I was sure he had died then. But it seems that he moved to the human world and lived there. That he had gotten married and had children... that's even a bigger shock" he confessed.

 _Color me surprise, when it is about family the old man shows emotions and is sincere._ I thought shocked. _Genji you better bring that girl back alive and make her a taichou, she will lessen our suffering._

 ** _"What is it Yamada-kun?"_** we all turned to the screen, as that girl asked _my Hana-chan._

They were walking a few feet behind the other three, and by the look in Hana's face whatever he was about to say was very serious.

" ** _The story Abarai-taichou just told has a lot of inconsistencies. Hollows do not go to reap hearts, not to mention that no matter how much Abarai-taichou had lowered his defenses he would have still sensed such a weak hollow. I might not be very good when it comes to use my zampaktou but I am great with sensing spiritual power and using kido. And one thing that I can sense is that there is a spiritual link between both of you, not to mention that I can not sense a heart in you at all. So can you tell me what really happened that night? And why Abarai-taichou is convinced of such a flawed story?_** " we all fell silent at that... no one was brave enough to utter a single word.

Hana-chan was right, Renji would sensed such a weak hollow and if that girl was strong enough to stop Renji she would have stayed that hollow without dying as well. What the hell was going on?! More fucking secrets?!

 ** _In a flash that girl had dragged Hana away from everyone and had him in a choke hold against a tree._**

 ** _"Hiromi! Where the heck did you go?!" Reno's voice was heard from afar._**

 ** _"Sorry Renji!" she chuckled innocently, it made me want to barf at how much bullshit I could hear in her tone "Yamada-kun and I sensed something moving and we went to check out. Get going, we will catch up soon!"_**

 ** _"Ok!"_**

"No! Not ok! Don't trust a word coming out of that bitch Renji! Go back and save Hana!" I growled to the screen, my patience slipping.

 ** _"Listen to me Yamada-kun, and listen closely because I won't repeat it twice" her whole visage changed and we were now facing a very dangerous and angry demon "Whatever happened that night does not matter, at least not to you. You will stop asking questions, understood? Otherwise, you will loose that tongue. And I really don't want to hurt you... or kill you. I really do like you, Yamada-kun. But Renji is one of my most important people and if it is found what happened that night... it will break him. So, keep quiet... or die" she threatened "That's your choice"_**

 ** _With that said she let him go and spirited away, leaving a dumbfounded Hana-chan behind._**

"What the fucking hell did just happen?!" I growled, confused- a feeling we have all gotten used to in the last few hours.

Whatever happened that night must be very important, not only for that girl and Renji, but for what is waiting ahead as well.


	16. Act II: Hanatarou

**Hanatarou** :

Weeks had passed since my confrontation against Kurosaki-san. I'm still as confused as I was before, there were too many things that did not fit.

She is as powerful as you could get, easily taichou level but she was not even a shinigami.

Then the fact that she was **The Man Killer** , who from what I've heard was a ruthless killer with a cold heart... things that she was not. Not to mention that **The Man Killer** was the protector of the weak, such avenger would have never left her territory just like that. Not even when the **Gotei 13** was after her did she try to escape, only when Renji-taichou hunted her down did she leave.

She was also big sister of the most powerful substitute shinigami in history, one that tended to act before he thinks. A behavior that's a common trait in the Kurosaki family, but she has still not shown. Which makes me wonder what happen in her past that makes her double think before she acts.

She is also a very beautiful woman, sweet, kind, motherly like, thoughtful of other's feelings, smart and honest... or at least most of the time. She could also be vindictive, sneaky, sly, cruel, flirty and secretive.

As if there were two different Kurosaki-san in one body... THAT'S THE BIG SECRET! SHE HAS A SOUL PERSONALITY DISORDER!

 _It kind of fits, giving more sense to the whole ordeal._ I thought. _It would explain why someone so loyal and such a defender of life and justice while alive would turn into such a vindictive bitch after dying. It is rare, but not unheard of souls being broken... tainted after a violent death. But that does not explain why Kurosaki-san was so afraid of Renji-taichou finding out about it. They are pretty close, I'm sure Renji-taichou has already found out about it. The only way to find out about it is taking him but first I need Kurosaki-san to leave._

As if Kami-sama heard my prayers, Ichigo-san stood up and said: "Onee-chan, would you like to () with me?" in such a puppy like manner that I could almost see the( tail waggling and ears flapping down).

Kurosaki-san being the loving big sister she is, she simply smiled warmly and answered sweetly: "Of course, ma petit fraise".

Once I was sure they had left, I hastily got to Renji-taichou's side and said: "Taichou, I believe I had just found out something about Kurosaki-san"

"Hiromi? What about her?" he replied, eyebrows frowning.

"Have you noticed that she has a soul personality disorder? I know it's rare, but when a someone..." I was cut off by Renji-taichou immediately.

"... has a violent death they can develop such a thing. I know, ah" he sighed "She indeed has such a sickness"

 _Then I was right, this is not what Kurosaki-san wants to keep silent and unknown from Renji-taichou. Then what's her lie? What's her secret?!_ I exclaimed in my head.

I normally do not intrude in people's lives, I respect the right everyone has to their privacy but somewhat I could not let this go- not even after Kurosaki-san threatened to kill me if I continued my research. Whatever she is hiding is important to this mission or at least to **The Zodiacs** ' plans.

But WHAT IS IT?!

"She was killed because she sacrificed herself for me. She is like this right now because of me... something I will never forgive myself of" he confessed, making me whip my head towards him.

 _ **That** night! That's the key to whatever she is hiding. It all goes back to **that** night... but there's where the problem lays. During these weeks I've noticed the power of her zampaktou **Syrena** , she can control people's minds with it, their emotions. Renji-taichou believing such an incomplete and inconsistent story simply solidified my belief that Kurosaki-san modified his memories of that night. Which lead me to believe that she woke up her zampaktou while she was still alive and whoever they fought that night was not a weak hollow... but a very strong opponent. But I still had many blanks in between facts_. I thought.

"I don't want you to judge her because of it. She no longer is dangerous" Renji-taichou continued, oblivious to my train of thoughts "She was lost in her madness for a long time, that's how she won her nickname. But she was still good in her core so even though she killed many they were all bad people. Only when I found her was I able to snap her out of it"

That caught my attention. People that suffer from soul personality disorder do not snap out of it so quickly simply because they met someone... then she does not have that. Maybe I will be able to find some clues in their meeting after the death.

"Taichou, can you please tell me how the hunt to The Men Killer proceeded? I was always cu-curious about the whole ordeal" I lied through my teeth, thanking whatever deity out there that Renji-taichou was so immersed in his guilt to notice my lying.

"Well, it all began when Byakuya-taichou chose me as his fukotaichou" he began retelling his story, with a nostalgic smile "It was around a couple of years after Hiromi's death, I wasn't capable of moving on from that damn night so I drowned myself in work, rising up the ladder of power in the sixth division until I was named fukotaichou...:

 _"Abarai-fukotaichou, many shinigamis that were sent to the Red Zone and their surroundings have been disappearing or found dead. From those who survived and came back informed us that the perpetrator is a woman who possessed a powerful zampaktou, they even say that she can achieve bankai" Byakuya-taichou began, I was tempted to interrupt him in sheer shock about a none-shinigami having a bankai but stayed quiet knowing how much he hated being cut off "Yamamada-dono is not convinced of the information that the survivors provided, after all they did come back... not completely sane. But as we already lost almost a whole division of shinigamis from different divisions, so he demanded I select a team. Will you accept the first mission as fukotaichou to lead and hunt down **The Men Killer**?" _

_"Yes, sir, yes!" I answered without hesitation and left to get ready for the mission._

 _It would be my first mission as a leader, as the second in command of Byakuya-taichou. I was so excited! But... also nervous. I could not fail this. Determined, I guided my newly formed team district through district. Everything was going as planned. The shinigami followed all my orders to the foot, defeating hollow after hollow. Even a Pain! I was so proud of the guys._

 _But I knew that things would not stay like that for long. Before leaving Byakuya-taichou informed me about how she was known as the heart reaper as well. The bodies that we managed to recover were all missing one thing... the heart. Our enemy isn't only powerful, but also a psyco._

 _It all went to hell when we reached our destination. Door after door was slammed on our faces, the shinigamis still there were an angry shivering mess whose story had many blank gaps. At first, I thought they acted out of fear. She was not nicknamed **The Men Killer** for nothing, but the civilians there only flinched when we got near and whenever we caught a civilian who was not afraid of **us** , they glared heatedly at us and told us to screw ourselves. _

_Something was very wrong there. I didn't want to believe it... but the signs were crystal clear! The shinigami that **The Men Killer** had assassinated were abusing their power in the worst way possible. So, in secret we decided to help her out. Still, she somehow found out about it and gave us the info we needed to make our case. Or, better said, she sent some civilian to give us the info we needed. _

_A few weeks later all those shinigami were stripped of their titled and sent to prison. Byakuya-taichou was proud of me. **The Men Killer** hunt stopped and no longer were heard rumors of her attacking shinigamis. That continued for a couple of months, until Byakuya-taichou called me to his office yet again. _

_"Abarai-fukotaichou, as you are aware The Men Killer is no longer an enemy to the Gotei 13 instead we owe her a great deal for getting rid of the trash. However, she is still a taichou level unknown person and has to be found. At least to be sure she means no harm to us and maybe even reclute her. the problem, no one managed to catch her yet. You, however, are the only one who ever had contact with her, even if it was simply through another person. That's why Yamada-dono requested you to lead another team there and start your search for her" he told me "You will be leaving tomorrow morning"_

 _"Hai!" I replied._

 _The search for her was even harder than the time before, as she was deliberately hiding from us. It took us a month, but at the end we found her... or better said, she found us. And let's just say one thing, it was not pretty. We were ambushed out of the blue, none saw it coming. My team was taken out, one by one, until only I was left standing. Thankfully, they were knocked out and not dead._

 _but at the moment I could care less for them, as my best friend, the one I thought gone forever, stood in front of me._

 _"Hiromi" I gasped._


End file.
